Saturday, May 08, 2010
Looks like I'm a disappointment again..
Didn't make it to any local university..
Guessed I've known that chances are slim..
But I wonder what is this feeling..
I'm not wallowing in sorrow..
There's nothing to regret because I known I'd done my best..
Especially in my studies..
I really tried hard..
Perhaps I studied hard but not smart..
My results just don't seem to reflect my efforts..
Seriously have no idea what is this I'm feeling..
All I know now is that I have a go and find a damn job..
She's disappointed with me..
Guessed that's a natural reaction..
I bet she never believed I tried my best in my studies..
She's been bugging me to get a job..
Now I'm seriously irritated at her insistance..
Why can't I just rot at home and just leave me alone..
Everyone just looks at the end results..
No one looks at the efforts put in..
I don't know what to do..
I'm seriously sick of this type of living..
A home where results are important..
I really cannot stand all of them..
But there is no way to escape..
I should start to promise myself to leave this place..
But I haven't had the heart and motivation to do so..
I think..
This feeling is called "resignation".